


Say the Words That I Can't Say

by minimalistfurniture



Series: Some Things Are Really Left Best Unspoken (But I Prefer It All to Be Out in The Open) [2]
Category: Wynonna Earp (TV)
Genre: Domestic Fluff, F/F, Fluff, One Shot Collection, Parenthood
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-09
Updated: 2017-09-12
Packaged: 2018-12-25 18:10:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,456
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12041403
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minimalistfurniture/pseuds/minimalistfurniture
Summary: Waverly and Nicole navigate the challenge of parenting together.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is just a little fun, fluffy, escapism to fill the post season void. Let me know what you think! All mistakes are my own and I don't own anything. Also, yes this is the second fic I have where they have a conversation about cat trees, mainly because I think there is something just so inherently funny about the phrase 'cat tree' that I can't help myself.

     They were reclining on the couch, Waverly sitting at one end and Nicole at the other, facing each other. The air was crisp with fall breeze, rustling the grass outside the homestead which was just now falling into darkness. Waverly was focused on her crocheting, working the hook in and out of the bobble hat she was making and periodically glancing up at her wife. Nicole was reading to her from the most recent copy of ‘The Economist’, as was their Sunday routine. She had just finished The World This Week at the beginning of the magazine and was moving on to the Leaders.  
     ‘The economy is only a fifth as big as that of its democratic capitalist cousin, South Korea. Americans spend twice its total GDP on their pets. Kim Jong Un’s ba-. ’  
     ‘Wait, Americans spend twice the GDP of North Korea on pets?’ Interrupted Waverly incredulously, looking up from her crocheting at the redhead.  
     ‘I know, makes you think.’ Mused Nicole in response.  
     ‘How much do you think we spend on Calamity Jane?’ The brunette asks in response, grinning at her wife.  
     ‘Far too much.’ Stats Nicole bluntly, ‘There is no way she needs that fancy organic food, or… whatever that is meant to be.’ She waves her hand in the direction of the humongous cat tree sitting in the corner of the room, something she was sure their cat had never once shown an interest in and which attracted all human attention through sheer size alone.  
     ‘Well, she liked the box it came in so I would argue that it was money well spent.’ Quipped Waverly back, pausing a while after to think about what she was about to voice out loud. ‘It’s nice having something for us to look after and nurture.’  
     ‘Don’t you mean spoil rotten? I swear Waves, that cat is going to get a superiority complex if-‘ She was interrupted again by Waverly.  
     ‘I want a baby!’ She blurted out, completely catching the redhead off-guard.  
     ‘I… You… What?’  
     ‘I’ve been thinking, I want us to have a baby Nicole. I know we talked about waiting a bit, I know that we said 25 and 29 was too young and we should spend more time as a married couple first but it’s been two years Nic. We’ve watched Alice grow up, watched Wynonna raise her. I want to do that with you. I want to start a family with you.’ At that, she looks into Nicole’s eyes, not really sure what kind of reaction she was going to get. Sure, she knew Nicole liked kids, she was amazing with Alice. They had abstractly spoken about having their own but that had been before they were married, before kids were on the table for real and not just hypothetically. Nicole stared at her, slack jawed, clearly trying to get her thoughts in order. ‘Oh gosh, I knew it was too soon,’ babbled Waverly nervously, ‘we can just forget I said anything.’  
     ‘Let’s do it.’ Nicole replied, finally pulling herself together, a smile playing at the corners of her mouth as she looked across the couch at her wife.  
     ‘Huh?’ Was the only response she got, the brunette’s head now buried in her hands.  
     ‘I don’t think it’s too soon. Let’s have a baby.’  
     ‘Wait, Nic, are you sure? Like really sure?’ Waverly reached across the space between them and clasped her wife’s hands in her own, The Economist lay forgotten between them.  
     ‘Yeah, I was just surprised when you brought it up. I mean, one minute you are talking about Calamity Jane and the next minute babies, you know? But, now my mouth has caught up with my brain, I can say for certain that there is nothing I would like more than to have a baby with you.’  
     ‘Really? I know it’s a huge commitment-’  
     ‘Yes really.’ Nicole interrupted her, rolling her eyes. ‘Waverly, we’re married. If that didn’t say to you that I was all in, ride or die with you, then let me remind you that I don’t throw around words like ‘rest of my life’ with just anyone. So yes, I want to have a baby with you. If that’s what you want.’  
     ‘Of course that’s what I want.’ Exclaimed Waverly, teary eyed. She crawled over to the redhead and sat down practically on top of her, leaning their head’s together.  
     ‘You’re carrying it though. There is no way in hell I’m going through that shit.’  
     ‘You mean pregnancy?’ Giggled Waverly in response.  
     ‘Yeah, I would much rather have my fingers disfigured by your pain induced death grip than push a screaming watermelon out of my downstairs area.’  
     ‘Right, well, thank you for successfully putting me off the miracle of birth Nicole. Plus I had assumed I would carry, what with your job and everything. Now all that’s left to do is find some ginger guy with a kinda similar nose. I may or may not have started research into it already.’  
     ‘Why am I not surprised?’


	2. Chapter 2

     The air was frustratingly, horribly, still. Not even an ounce of breeze drifted through the open window at the top floor of the Homestead. Waverly and Nicole laid flat on their backs, deliberately not touching and staring up at the ceiling, dark circles under both of their eyes.  
     ‘Why is it so hot?’ Waverly broke the silence of the room to ask, ‘It shouldn’t get this hot in Alberta. I think I’m dying.’ Nicole huffed in agreement.  
     ‘Think how hot it is in hell.’ She responded, turning her head to look at her wife. ‘We’ll never be able to cope.’  
     ‘Why are we going to hell?’ Asked Waverly furrowing her brow.  
     ‘You know, standard reasons. Wearing mixed fiber, taking the Lord’s name in vain and of course all of the gay sex, that can’t help.’ Comments the redhead nonchalantly.  
     ‘Yeah, I would repent if it wasn’t so much fun. Especially the mixed fiber, I love a good poly-cotton blend.’ She grins over at her wife, adding, ‘I forget you used to be Catholic sometimes.’  
     ‘You and me both.’ They lapse back in to silence again, the digital clock on the mantle showing 2:15 am. The baby in the cot next to their bed was sound asleep, blanket clutched firmly in her tiny hand.  
     ‘Ironic really,’ Starts the brunette, ‘We spend weeks trying to get her to sleep through the night and the moment she does, we can’t.’  
     ‘I know. I’m so exhausted, but I’m also sweating through my t-shirt. Why don’t we own any fans?’  
     ‘I don’t know. That’s what I’m doing in the morning, buying all the fans in town. I don’t care if I have to fight every person in a hundred-mile radius to get to one, this will not be happening again tomorrow night.’ Waverly stated forcefully. Nicole grinned at this, turning on her side to face her wife.  
     ‘Please don’t actually fight anyone. I would hate to have to arrest you, in a non-sexy way that is.’ Waverly mirrored her position and reached out her arm so it was near, but not quite touching the taller woman.  
     ‘I just want to sleep like we normally do!’ She lamented, keeping her voice hushed as to not wake baby Winter. Nicole snorted with laughter.  
     ‘What? You mean with me, squished on to the edge of the bed as you take all of the blankets, snore, and drape yourself across me in a way that is only comfortable for one of us?’  
     ‘Yes, obviously.’ Responds Waverly, ‘What can I say, you make a good pillow.’  
     ‘Maybe we should just pop some decongestant cold and flu tablets and see if they can knock us out’ Suggests Nicole.  
     ‘I only buy the non-drowsy ones.’ Sighs Waverly back, mournfully.  
     ‘Damn it. Please just hit me over the head?’ Whines her wife.  
     ‘But then I would be awake alone. Sorry Nicole, if I can’t sleep because I’m slowly turning into a puddle then you have to stay up with me. It was in our wedding vows.’  
     ‘Ah, yes.’ The redhead sighs, ‘In sickness, health, and heat wave related insomnia, I forgot. Maybe we should take a cold shower?’ She suggested.  
     ‘Yes!’ Exclaimed Waverly, sitting up in bed. ‘I’ll sort the baby monitor now.’ Nicole gets up and grimaces at the heaviness in the air. They both lean over the crib. Winter looks completely content in her sleep, her tuft of red hair sticking out at a silly angle, cozy in her soft onesie. It was patterned with little police cars, a gift from Wynonna.  
     ‘You made a good baby, Earp.’ Comments Nicole, reaching down to adjust Mr. Crocodile who had been pushed down to the corner of the crib.  
     ‘We made a good baby, I think you mean.’ Corrected Waverly, smiling.  
     ‘Yeah, you did all of the hard work though.’ Insisted Nicole, grinning back.  
     ‘Tell me about it. I don’t think my body will ever feel normal again.’ Replied the brunette, trying to pass it off as a joke but clearly feeling bothered a little by the reality.  
     ‘It’s only been a couple of months since you gave birth Wave, everything will settle back down. Plus, I think the stretch marks are sexy.’ Waverly laughs out loud in response.  
     ‘Whatever you say Nic. But… thank you.’ She sees the puzzled look on her wife’s face and continues, ‘For never ever making me feel less attractive, less wanted.’  
     Nicole comes to stand right next to her wife and toys with the hem of her shirt. ‘I will always find you attractive Waverly.’ The shorter woman scoffs at that, looking down at the floor. ‘Seriously, you’ve doomed yourself to a life of being endlessly admired. Even when we are old and wrinkly I will still be boasting about how my wife is the most beautiful woman on the face of the planet. I wasn’t kidding when I said your stretch marks were sexy. They are a natural part of you and they are on your body, so of course I think they are. Having said that, right now, they will just have to be sexy from afar. It’s too hot to even think about touching you, sorry baby.’ Waverly chuckles, wiping the corner of her eyes absently.  
     ‘Ok. How about we go take that shower?’ She replies, gripping her wife’s hand.  
     ‘Sounds good to me.’


	3. Chapter 3

     ‘Right, it's going to start boarding in ten minutes.’ Called Nicole to the group of them all stood around Gate 14 at Calgary International Airport. ‘Now is the time to go if you need the bathroom or anything.’ She continued, directing her statement to eight-year-old Alice and four-year-old Winter, both of whom were totally ignoring her and instead staring at the planes through the big windows.  
     ‘Kids, listen to whatever pointless thing Nicole is saying.’ Ordered Wynonna, chewing on a Twizzler.  
     ‘Thanks for the backup Wy.’ Grumbled Nicole.  
     ‘Don’t sweat it Haught.’ She got back as a response. ‘Come on Alice, let’s go pee before we have to sit down for three and a half hours. You know what they say about airplane toilets.’ Wynonna whispered conspiratorially to the children, both instantly gripped and shaking their heads. ‘Sometimes, when they’re feeling particularly mean, they suck you down when you flush ‘em. You’ll never be seen or heard from again.’ The horrified looks on the children’s faces as they were lead away to the restroom by Wynonna was enough to make Nicole lean her head on her wife’s shoulder.  
     ‘Kill me now.’ She mumbles as Waverly directs her attention away from her phone.  
     ‘We’re not even on the plane yet. You might want to hold off that request for a couple days when we have two sugar-filled children bouncing off the walls of our hotel room.’ She responds, patting Nicole on the back.  
     ‘This is all your fault for suggesting we go to Disneyland.’ Accused the redhead playfully.  
     ‘Oh, come on, it was your idea too!’ Exclaimed Waverly in response, ‘Think how much fun Winter is going to have. Plus, I always wanted to go when I was a kid but we never could, this is my chance to have a do-over with Wynonna and Gus. We’re going to take a photo with Goofy if it’s the last thing I do.’  
     ‘Ok, yes, I admit it will be fun. But you’re going to be the one telling our daughter that under no circumstances is she allowed those plastic princess high heels they weirdly sell children.’ Nicole said, wrapping an arm around the brunette’s waist.  
     ‘No kidding. The day I let her wear something like that, you’ll know I’ve been re-gooed.’ Waverly pauses after this, her voice dropping slightly as she changes the subject. ‘Think about it like this Nic, Gus will be babysitting the children’ she leans into her wife, hands coming up and looping around her neck, ’We can spend some quality time just you and me… alone in our hotel room. No one to interrupt us.’ Nicole grins at this and pulls the smaller woman closer.  
     ‘When you put it like-‘  
     ‘Hey, hands off my sister Haught!’ Wynonna comes striding up to them, both children in tow, ‘We’re gone for all of two seconds and you already pull out the moves, I don’t know whether to be impressed or horrified.’  
     ‘Yeah!’ Chimed in Alice, ‘Kissing is so gross you guys.’  
     ‘Ma!’, Exclaimed Winter, running up to Waverly and tugging on her sweater, ‘I went to the bathroom!’ She exclaimed excitedly.  
     ‘Awesome!’ Exclaimed Waverly, crouching down to give her daughter a high five.  
     ‘Yes Winter, thanks for letting us all know.’ Interjected Nicole, sarcasm going completely over her daughter’s head but earning a look of disapproval from Waverly.  
     ‘No problem Mommy.’ The child replied, walking over to hold Nicole’s hand.  
     ‘Where the hell is Gus?’ Asked Wynonna, scanning the bustling airport.  
     ‘She went to buy a magazine like fifteen minutes ago.’ Answered Waverly, turning her attention back to her phone. ‘Someone should probably go look for her, we’ll be boarding soon.’  
Wynonna looks expectantly at Waverly, ‘Yeah, you should go. What the hell are you doing on that phone that’s so important anyway?’  
     ‘Wynonna, she has been like this all week.’ Grumbled Nicole, shooting an amused look at her wife.  
     ‘I’ll have both of you know that history is being made, my Candy Crush high score is through the roof.’ Waverly commented back absently.  
     ‘I’m so sorry.’ Exclaimed Gus, striding up behind them. ‘They had Horticulture Magazine and Canadian Gardening. I couldn’t make up my mind.’  
     ‘Oh yes, what a tough and thrilling decision.’ Comments Wynonna, starting on a new Twizzler just as an announcement comes over the speakers.  
     ‘Now boarding flight 73BXY to Los Angeles. We would first like to invite passengers with children and those with a premium membership card to board first.’ As she then repeats it in French, Wynonna grabs her bag and Alice’s hand and turns to the rest of her family.  
     ‘Let’s get on this damn plane then. I’m gonna need a ton of those tiny bottles of booze to start this vacation off right.’ She headed to the gate, passport out, followed by Gus. Waverly took Nicole’s free hand in hers and pulled her family behind the others.  
     ‘Come on gang, this is so exciting.’ She exclaimed as Winter cheered, running to catch up with the others. Nicole grinned at her wife and daughter’s evident thrill, maybe this trip wouldn’t be a total disaster after all.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Disneyland part two.

     ‘Oh my God. We are officially the worst parents ever!’ Exclaimed Waverly, eyes scanning the busy area around Downtown Disneyland.   
     ‘No, we’re not. It’s only been half an hour, Wynonna and Gus are looking for her too.’ Reassured Nicole, despite the panicked look on her face.  
     ‘This is going to be what she talks about in therapy as an adult.’   
     ‘If the only thing she talks about is how we once lost her in Disneyland when she was four, then we will have been great parents.’ Absently comments Nicole, focusing all her attention on her surroundings. Waverly abruptly sits down on the curb and puts her head in her hands.  
     ‘I think I’m going to be sick.’ She mumbles so softly that Nicole barely catches it. Sighing, the redhead sits down next to her wife and puts a hand on her back, stroking her thumb in calming circles. ‘I just looked away for two seconds, I swear Nic, I only let go of her hand long enough to get the bottle of water out of my bag. What if someone took her? Or what if she thinks we left her?’ Waverly was breathing shallowly, head never leaving her hands.  
     ‘Well, for one, this isn’t your fault Waves. No one took her, we have taught her what to do in case anything suspicious happens and she is a smart girl, she just got separated from us. It’s not the end of the world, my parents once lost me for two hours at the Texas State Fair and I turned out alright.’ This made Waverly look up, glaring daggers at her wife  
     ‘You don’t speak to your parents anymore Nicole and you haven’t been back to Texas in over ten years!’ She exclaims.  
     ‘Yeah, but that’s not because I got distracted by cows when I was little and they lost me. It will be ok Waverly, let’s not fall into abject despair, we are not a Smiths song.’ Waverly huffs at her wife in response.  
     ‘I think they had some good ideas, for instance right now I really understand Panic.’ She snaps out.  
     ‘Waves-‘  
     ‘Suffer Little Children as well.’  
     ‘Maybe a poor choice, that’s about the Moors Murders-‘  
     ‘Heaven knows I’m Miserable Now!’ Waverly half yells, causing people to turn and stare at them on the street.   
     ‘Ok.’ Sighed the redhead, ‘I know your upset Baby, but I need you to take a breath. Sitting here working ourselves up is not helping find her. Let’s go try and find an employee, we totally should have done that already.’ Nicole stands up and offers a hand to her wife.  
     ‘Oh my God, you are so right. Why didn’t we think of that sooner?’  
     ‘You know, blind panic coupled with stress and existential dread about our parenting ability.’ Supplied Nicole, taking Waverly’s hand and pulling out the map. ‘Where do you suppose the help desk is?’ Out of the corner of her eye, she spots, in the distance, a flash of auburn hair, a yellow sundress, and a Micky Mouse hat. Nicole takes off running, dropping Waverly’s hand and totally ignoring her wife’s puzzled exclamation behind her. She pushes through a crowd of people, police training kicking into action and she sprints, her lungs burning from the exertion.  
     ‘Mommy!’ Called Winter, spotting her through the crowd, she is stood next to a smiling Disney employee and waving. Nicole crashed into her, sweeping her up in a huge hug.  
     ‘God, sweetheart, never ever do that to me again. We were so worried.’ Nicole stays like that for several seconds, she hears the tell-tale signs of Waverly jogging up behind her before her wife is also crashing into the hug.  
     ‘Ma!’ Exclaims Winter, ‘We’ve been looking for you everywhere.’  
     ‘We’ve been looking for you Pumpkin.’ Replies Waverly as they both pulled back from the hug.  
     ‘Took you a while to catch up.’ Joked Nicole to the smaller woman, panting.  
     ‘Yeah well, not everyone has your long legs.’ Says Waverly, smiling and wiping away a stray tear from the corner of her eye. The Disney worker leans down to Winter.  
     ‘So, these are your parents Winter?’  
     ‘Yeah, this is my Ma and my Mommy.’ She explains to the man, ‘This is Mark, he is really nice.’ She turns to her parents, clinging onto Waverly’s leg.  
     ‘Thank you so so much.’ Exclaimed Nicole, lurching over in an unexpected move and pulling a slightly shocked Mark into a bear hug.  
     ‘No problem!’ He chirped back once he had extracted himself from her grip and fixed the angle of his collar. ‘It was nice to meet you, Winter. Have a great rest of your vacation folks.’ He waved goodbye and set off back to the park.   
     ‘Sorry for getting lost.’ Said Winter, hanging her head.  
     ‘No sweetie,’ Reassured Nicole crouching down. ‘We’re just happy we found you. Winter, you absolutely did the right thing by finding someone who works here. You are our little star.’ She sighed pulling her into another hug.  
     ‘Such a star.’ Agreed Waverly, being pulled into the hug as well by her daughter. ‘And you are too.’ She continued, looking at Nicole. ‘Sorry I got snappy and shouted Smiths songs at you.’  
     ‘That’s ok Baby.’ Sighed Nicole, holding on to her family.


End file.
